Dropping this here for those who are curious: it's my script for the 2023 Rewind, which I hosted January 5 in Turntable.fm's "I ♥ the 80s" room. The YouTube playlist is at https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLNytiCK5aidbIVu1oyEh-f4KgsnFt49zs
1/5/23 (S02E05, #48, The Rewind)
Starting countdown checklist:
PM robo /autodj off
/settheme It's RulesLawyers Top Ten Countdown!
Set the room theme in the Room menu
/setmaxdjs 1
[Just as the intro starts]
⚖🔝🔟 Good morning, bots and bods, welcome to The Rewind, a special edition of RulesLawyer's Top Ten Countdown on I <3 the 80s, where we reveal the top trending '80s tracks from 2023, based on your spins, awesomes, and other appropriate displays of public affection.
[at 1:11, after the burst montage]
⚖🔝🔟 I'm your host, RulesLawyer, and despite a few WMG challenges, we've got a full countdown for you, plus several more surprises. Security Chief @Dr. Fart Mustache is keeping the stage tidy and @Mr. Roboto has been churning overtime to calculate your top ten favorites in several categories. Sit back, crack open a Bartles & Jaymes, and let's jump right in.
[kick off factoids as soon as stats for the previous song appear]
⚖🔝🔟 We kick off the Rewind with an iconic '80s tune. The speaking parts are performed by Magnus Pyke, a famous British TV host for a children's educational show, the Bill Nye of the other side of the pond. His trademark was yelling "Science!" throughout the show. He does so again here, in Thomas Dolby's "She Blinded Me With Science!"
[kick off "coming up nexts" at the 0:30 seconds remaning mark.]
⚖🔝🔟 Coming up next: the top 10 novelty tracks of the year!
⚖🔝🔟 Our #9 song only took the band 20 minutes to write. The initial demo had a soft tone, but producer William Wittman encouraged the band to rock harder. Inspired by the performances of The Who and the vocals of Sting, it became a huge hit, landing on the Billboard charts in January 1986 and peaking at #6 four months later, spending 22 weeks in the Hot 100. Here's The Outfield, "Your Love".
⚖🔝🔟 Coming up next: the top 10 artists of the year!
⚖🔝🔟 WMG blocked Stacey Q's well-played video (35 spins this year), but they didn't yet get to this Eurobeat remix yet. She also performed this song in a 1986 episode of THE FACTS OF LIFE, where Tootie tries to sabotage her character's chance to perform on Broadway, in yet another instance of a 28-year-old playing the role of a teenager in the '80s. The #8 song of the year, here's "Two of Hearts"
⚖🔝🔟 Coming up next: the top 10 Covers Day songs of the year!
⚖🔝🔟 In one of the earliest synergies of product placement in a music video, Paper Mate funded Autograph's 1984 hit video on the condition the band showcase their Sharpwriter mechanical pencil. I mean, the band's name, the album (SIGN IN PLEASE)… how could they not? The band was a one-hit-wonder, pencilled in at #29, with no further hits. They broke up in 1989. Shoulda used a pen. On the Rewind at #7, here's "Turn Up the Radio"
⚖🔝🔟 Alien Ant Farm obtained Michael Jackson's permission for this cover song, and MJ suggested that a scene with a boy wearing a mask be removed. MJ didn't like the edited version either, so had them keep that scene in. Thus, there are two versions of this video floating around. Nominated for "Best Hard Rock Performance" at the 2002 Grammys and winning "Top Cover Song" earlier today, at #6, here's "Smooth Criminal"
⚖🔝🔟 Oh, they're very popular, Ed. The sportos, the motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, wastoids, dweebies, dickheads - coming up next: the top DJs of the year!
⚖🔝🔟 Simple Minds didn't want to record a song they didn't write, but after seeing an early screening of THE BREAKFAST CLUB with John Hughes, they came around. It's a Keith Forsey song, like "Shakedown" from BEVERLY HILLS COP and "Flashdance… What a Feeling". The band ad libbed the opening "hey, hey, hey, hey" part, though. It's the #5 song of the year and the start of a John Hughes /twofer, "Don't You (Forget About Me)"
[Bumper is the Breakfast Club / Ferris Bueller scene from Ready Player One]
⚖🔝🔟 You know who was big in "Big In Japan"? Monique Meier, who starred alongside of Alphaville's Marian Gold in their 1983 video. Monique got the role because her husband, Dieter, was the video's director. Who? Dieter Meier is best known as the vocalist from a 1984 song that appeared in John Hughes' iconic film, FERRIS BUELLER'S DAY OFF. His band? Yello. His song, appearin four times on our Countdown in 2023, is here at #4: "Oh Yeah"
https://i.imgur.com/GD0nbdv.png
⚖🔝🔟 Coming up next: the top '90s Day songs of the year!
⚖🔝🔟 Dire Strait's Mark Knopfler and Sting are credited as writers on the third-most-loved song of the year. (Sting gets credit for the lead-in "I want my MTV".) It won a Grammy in 1986 for Best Rock Vocal Performance by a Duo or Group, and Best Video at the 1986 VMAs. Animated by Paintbox, the digital characters were supposed to have buttons on their shirts, it wasn't in the budget. Here's "Money for Nothing"
⚖🔝🔟 Up next, a tearful look back at some of the biggest names the '80s community lost in 2023.
⚖🔝🔟 Even WMG's attempt at blocking our #1 song of the year couldn't give crooning cinephile Michael Bolton the top spot. His video was shot on location atop the sweeping views of Alstrom Point, Utah, a location which was also used for Britney Spears' video for "I'm Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman", and 1968's PLANET OF THE APES. @Mr. Roboto says that it's the second-most-loved song of 2023, "Said I Loved You...But I Lied"
[Bumper is a recap of everything above. Wait until maybe 5 seconds into the #1 spin to drop the factoid.]
⚖🔝🔟 Our top spin of the year is blocked by WMG. We spun it 84 times in 2023, repeating "it's a new release" like a mantra. Unknown to us, lead singer Marian Gold had just recorded and released a room-filling symphonic version incorporating the original video from 40 years earlier. With nearly a million views on YouTube and more love from y'all than any other song in 2023, it's surprisingly new. It's epic. It's #1. It's "Big In Japan"
⚖🔝🔟 And that's a wrap! Thanks for listening to The Rewind, the top trending '80s tracks of 2023. Keep those turntables spinning, bots and bods, and play your favorites to help them climb the 2024 charts. Robo's always watching, counting, and feeling the love.
⚖🔝🔟 We'll see you back here next Friday for our regular weekly Top Ten Countdown! Hop on up and play a cover tune, show love to your fellow DJs, and be excellent to each other!
⚖🔝🔟 Special thanks to @jodrell and @mr. roboto, who put in a ton of work behind the scenes to assemble most of the data used for The Rewind. Thanks to our bouncer, @Dr. Fart Mustache, for keeping the riff raff away from the stage all year. And thanks to all of you for watching. We now return you to your normally scheduled Covers Friday, already in progress.
/micdrop
⚖🔝🔟 If you missed any of The Rewind, or just want to p-p-play it again, the full YouTube playlist is at https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLNytiCK5aidbIVu1oyEh-f4KgsnFt49zs
Ending checklist:
/settheme It's covers Friday! Hop up and play covers of '80s tunes or cover songs by '80s artists.
Set the room theme in the Room menu
/setmaxdjs 5
/autodj on
Top 10 tracks as of 12/29/23
Artist Track Total Points Play Count
1 Alphaville Big In Japan 17424 84
2 Michael Bolton Said I Loved You...But I Lied 10073 116
3 Dire Straits Money For Nothing 6976 39
4 Yello Oh Yeah 6512 41
5 Simple Minds Don't You (Forget About Me) 6342 33
6 Alien Ant Farm Smooth Criminal 6174 30
7 Autograph Turn up the Radio 5712 31
8 Stacey Q Two Of Hearts 4667 35
9 The Outfield Your Love (Official HD Video) 4536 34
10 Thomas Dolby She Blinded Me With Science 4425 26
11 Styx Mr. Roboto 4410 31
12 The Romantics Talking in Your Sleep 4320 30
13 Ghost It`s a Sin (Pet Shop Boys cover) HD 1080p 4320 28
14 The Birthday Party Release the Bats 4242 78
15 The Buggles Video Killed The Radio Star 4103 29
[Edit January 8: fived bad YouTube playlist link]
